Listening for God in Each Other, Spiritual Direction

Gerald May: Spiritual Direction, Listening for God in Each Other

“Besides differing from psychotherapy in intent, content, and basic attitude, spiritual direction is generally marked by a distinctive atmosphere seldom found in any other interpersonal relationship. As one person put it, ‘Being in spiritual direction is like being in prayer, only there’s someone with me in it.’”—Gerald G. May in Care of Mind/Care of Spirit: A Psychiatrist Explores Spiritual Direction (HarperSanFrancisco, 1982), p. 113.

When I took down Dr. May’s book Care of Mind/Care of Spirit from my bookshelf and opened it, a September 1990 bulletin fell out. It mentioned a book group at my church reading Care of Mind/Care of Spirit. The book had no marks, so I knew I had not read it. This happened more than thirty years ago, two months before I entered recovery. 

Our book group had read May’s book Addiction and Grace the previous year. For some reason, I was not ready to hear May’s words then. But on this day, it was different. In 1990, we became missionary members of Saint Mark’s Church to start another Episcopal church in a growing part of our city. Alas, May’s book would have been helpful in starting a new congregation as I began life in recovery, and even more so nine years later, when I was studying to become a deacon.  

This is one of the best books I have read on spiritual direction. Dr. May emphasizes how spiritual direction differs from his own highly effective psychotherapy. In therapy, the director or caregiver “hopes to encourage more efficient living in the prevailing culture, seeking to bolster an individual’s capacity to achieve a sense of autonomous mastery over self and circumstances.” By contrast, spiritual direction “seeks liberation from attachments and a self-giving surrender to the will of God.”

At some point, spiritual direction may stand in opposition to many cultural standards and values supported by psychotherapy. May skillfully writes about how a spiritual director constantly seeks out rabbit holes or traps the directee may encounter while simultaneously looking for God in their life. May also reminds us that the real healer is God and that the director and directee are merely channels. 

May cautions spiritual directors about how easily we can become distorted in our roles, “playing God.” I try to keep this book as close as possible while doing the direction. Sometimes I have to avoid obsessing over what May would say about something that comes up in a meeting. After spending some time together, I hurriedly look up the appropriate chapter. But, of course, May would say that our job is not to worry about what we say in the moment, but to focus solely and “most soulfully” on connecting this person to God in that moment! 

Joanna.   https://www.joannaseibert.com/

Hope from the Fresh Air of the Gospel

Hope from the Fresh Air of the Gospel

“When the fresh air of the Gospel becomes our oxygen, the world’s collective sin will burn our sensitized lungs like toxic fumes. We will notice injustice everywhere we turn, and our powerlessness will crucify our hearts. Then we will know the hope of the Resurrection from the inside. God’s power to raise, to heal, and to save will flow through us because God will be our only lasting hope.”—Br. Keith Nelson, SSJE

I try to remember and say this prayer as I stand to read the Gospel each Sunday. Gospel means Good News. Each year, I learn more that this is a weekly privilege, and one of our diaconal missions is to focus on reading the Gospel to the best of our abilities.

That means practicing it out loud until it becomes part of who we are. Not overacting or underacting. Trying to surrender to the message. I have learned that we can only deliver the Word if we are connected to the Christ within. We strive to sense the Spirit within us and the presence of Christ in each member of the congregation, especially those who may be struggling.

When this happens, healing electricity flows from the Word to the people and back to the Gospel. Truly hearing the Word can move our hearts to action. The message of Christ in the Gospel leads us to share Christ's presence with one another as the Gospel message permeates the nave of the church. This healing presence gives us peace and promise for the day, healing for the past, and hope for the future.

Those who study dreams believe that every dream holds both a promise and a warning. This may also be true of many gospel passages we read and hear each Sunday. Looking for the warning and the promise, as we do in dreamwork, as we read and hear the Sunday Gospel message, might give us new hope in the Good News and in God’s message.

Joanna joannseibert.com

The Connections Between Scattering Seed, Good Soil, and the Women Who Followed Jesus

The Connection Between Scattering Seed, Good Soil, and the Women Who Followed Jesus

Guest Writers: Steve and Sally Harms

women who followed Jesus

Jesus used parables to help us understand deeper theological truths. He often drew illustrations from farming, an occupation familiar to nearly everyone who heard Him. For us in Northwest Arkansas, where the closest we may get to agriculture is a Walmart grocery aisle, the farming practices behind the parable may require a little more thought.

Modern agriculture reflects our society’s relentless pursuit of productivity. Technology, specialization, and economies of scale have transformed the way we produce food. While America was once dominated by farmers, today fewer than 2% of Americans work in agriculture.

My Dad remembered living when much of the flat land in Northwest Arkansas was devoted to growing cotton. Try to find a cotton field here today. Cotton can be grown more efficiently elsewhere, while Northwest Arkansas has become remarkably productive in poultry. This is how our economic system works: specialize, improve efficiency, eliminate waste, and maximize productivity.

We apply the same principles to our personal lives. We seek productive employees, efficient organizations, successful relationships, and worthwhile activities. We have even become so focused on productivity that we don’t want to waste much time eating the food we produce. The popularity of fast food and protein drinks is perhaps one small illustration of our desire to maximize efficiency.

The farming practices of Jesus’ day were very different. Farmers typically scattered seed by hand, broadcasting it across the field. Some seed inevitably landed on the path, among rocks, or among thorns. Only some landed in good soil.

What strikes our modern minds is how much seed was apparently wasted. But waste was not an unfamiliar concept in biblical agriculture. The Torah even required farmers to leave the edges of their fields unharvested (law of Gleaning). The poor, widows, orphans, and foreigners were allowed to gather what remained. What looked inefficient from the perspective of maximizing production was actually an intentional expression of generosity.

That helps us see something important in Jesus’ parable. Jesus describes four kinds of soil: “The ones on the path are those who have heard; then the devil comes and takes away the word from their hearts, so that they may not believe and be saved. The ones on the rock are those who, when they hear the word, receive it with joy. But these have no root; they believe only for a while and in a time of testing fall away. As for what fell among the thorns, these are the ones who hear; but as they go on their way, they are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature. But as for that in the good soil, these are the ones who, when they hear the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patient endurance” (Luke 8:12–15).

Our modern minds naturally want to identify the good soil and eliminate the rest. That is how we think about productivity: identify what works, invest more in it, and eliminate what does not. But Jesus does something quite different. He does not tell the farmer to examine the soil carefully before scattering the seed. The emphasis of the parable is not simply where the seed (the Word) lands, but what happens afterwards. The Word is offered generously. We cannot know in advance what will happen when someone hears it.

But the gospel is not reserved for those who appear to be the most promising recipients. Immediately before Jesus tells the parable, Luke introduces several women who were part of His ministry: “As well as some women who had been cured of evil spirits and infirmities: Mary, called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out, and Joanna, the wife of Herod’s steward Chuza, and Susanna, and many others, who provided for them out of their resources” (Luke 8:2–3).

These women occupied very different places in society, and some had experienced significant suffering and marginalization. Yet they became important participants in Jesus’ ministry. Were they the people others would have identified as “good soil”? Perhaps not. And that may be precisely the point. Jesus did not limit His ministry to the people who appeared most likely to respond. He welcomed people others might have overlooked, judged, or excluded. Jesus scattered the seed generously. “Let anyone with ears to hear listen!” (Luke 8:8).

Steve and Sally Harms, “Scattered Seeds,” Daily Reflection, St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, Fayetteville, Arkansas, October 9, 2026. www.stpaulsfay.org

Joanna Joannaseibert.com