Non-anxious Presence/Or Less Anxious Presence
“The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient. One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach—waiting for a gift from the sea.”
—Anne Morrow Lindbergh in Gift from the Sea (Pantheon Books, 1955).
Still Waters . joanna Campbell
Story: Our famous Jane from old school Dick and Jane loves her outreach ministry at her church; but sometimes there is chaos and sometimes people get upset at others and are “not Christian.” Maybe she should take a geographic cure and go to a more “Christian” church where people get along better.
Response: Former Bishop Maze teaches that if we do not engage in a ministry, we will not stay connected to our church. We discover the ministry God calls us to by learning about our gifts and then offering them to the ministry where the gifts seem to best fit. We follow the most quoted Buechner line about ministry. “The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”
Then what happens?
We are humans. Church and all its ministries and groups are part of an organization that is “a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.” Eventually we are going to run into people problems and relationship difficulties, just as we do at home and work!
Anne Morrow Lindbergh describes our ideal state—the way we would like to be in all our relationships: waiting as “choiceless” as the beach while it anticipates gifts from the sea.
Family Systems dynamics teach us, in the midst of any conflict in a relationship with others, to maintain a state of having the least anxiety—to be a non-anxious presence. If we do this we will make our best contribution toward preventing any tensions from escalating, and eventually will help solve the difficulty. I know of few who can remain non-anxious, for it is not a common human trait. Staying less anxious, however, is a real possibility. If we can be the least anxious presence in any situation, it will keep the arteries in our body from tightening up (a condition that steals minutes, or even weeks from our lifespan). Our inner and outer presence will stay calmer, and we can become a vessel for the Spirit to enter the relationship or situation or meeting or encounter or ministry.
Answer: So how do we become like the beach waiting for the gift from the sea, as Lindbergh is describing? Easy? It involves spiritual disciplines. Prayer and meditation before, during, and after each ministry event is a huge beginning. I am still in the process of learning from others’ spiritual disciplines: Centering Prayer, Morning Prayer, yoga, following a rule of life, spiritual direction, worshiping together, studying. There are many more. Our three-legged stool, consisting of tradition, Scripture, and reason, informs us that these disciplines can be gifts from God to help us care for our souls and those of others.
Rebecca Spooner is leading a morning retreat about the Enneagram at St. Mark’s Episcopal Church on Saturday February 29th from 9 to 1. The Cost is $15. Sign up on St. Mark’s website lovesaintmarks.org. Go to What’s on, then Events.
Joanna . joannaseibert.com