Eating Together as a Spiritual Practice
“The question of bread for myself is a material question, but the question of bread for my neighbor is a spiritual question.”—Nikolai Berdyaev.
Indeed, Jesus gives us continued examples of his feeding thousands, as well as going to eat at the home of others, often with the most despised, such as Zacchaeus and Matthew, tax collectors. Jesus, a role model in this, feeds others and lets others feed him. For Christians, Jesus leaves us with another meal, the Eucharist of bread and wine, a sacrament reminding us of his care and bringing his presence to us.
When I am having difficulty with someone, I imagine us together at the altar rail, kneeling, if possible, to receive the bread and wine of the Eucharist. Jesus is with us. After kneeling together, I see the person in a different light. Sometimes I can see the Christ within them.
I have given up trying to understand why eating a meal with someone else can help us develop a relationship faster than spending hours talking to that person. As we are being fed, we see the person more clearly. So often, we can continue a deeper conversation when food is present. It is almost as if the food is a natural ice breaker.
I remember when, in my medical practice, I worked with nine other physicians. Each of them had unique gifts and was an advocate for distinct parts of our practice. Each person wanted their area to be funded and fully staffed.
One day, we decided to have lunch together once a week to try to work through complex issues. The situation changed almost overnight. We began to see each other’s needs as they related to our many areas of interest. We prioritized what was most important for the patients we cared for, instead of focusing on our own needs. Some of us even became lifelong friends!
